of having his life changed for ever.
Him and the missus is on their way in receiving the best gift one can ever get!
If all goes well he will be dad by the end of today. Good luck boet and enjoy your new girl!
Sleepless nights, being puked on, changing nappies, don't have an idea what to do! The joys of having children.
Thursday 19 November 2009
Monday 26 October 2009
Trip down to Mosselbay
Two weeks ago we went to vist great granny who stays in Grootbrak. For those of you who are not familiar with the area, it is in the Western cape close to Mosselbay.
We flew down and I had to contend two hours with my little boy sitting on my lap. He was not phased at all about flying. The only thing that mattered to him was how to get the tray table clip undone. Luckily he studied the safety information so I would not have any issues with him in case of an emergency
We arrived at George airport, got a nissan Tilda hire and went to drop all our luggage at the guest house in Tergniet. It is a wonderful situated house with a lovely view over the ocean.
Every morning we could see whales just of shore
One of our biggest past times during the day was to go and swim in the heated pool in Hartenbos.
Tuesday we dedicated to take a drive to Oudtshoorn as the wind picked up everyday taking away any chance of lying on the beach. We did the tourist thing and visited an ostrich farm and the Kango wildlife sanctuary.
Stood on some ostrich eggs,
And even took a ride on one
We did go to the beach when the weather gave us a chance. But with the fairest Cape that is not always a possibility.
Hear is dropshot going down a dune.
Most of the days was spend going for a early walk on the beach and a swim in the afternoon. It was a relaxing week. Great granny is still strong but age is starting to take it toll. Walking up and down stairs is only achieved with great effort, she is only a mere 83 years old.
She enjoyed her great grandchildren for the week and spoiled them with stuff to munch everytime they walked into her house.
Hopefully if all goes well we will do so again next year.
We flew down and I had to contend two hours with my little boy sitting on my lap. He was not phased at all about flying. The only thing that mattered to him was how to get the tray table clip undone. Luckily he studied the safety information so I would not have any issues with him in case of an emergency
We arrived at George airport, got a nissan Tilda hire and went to drop all our luggage at the guest house in Tergniet. It is a wonderful situated house with a lovely view over the ocean.Every morning we could see whales just of shore
One of our biggest past times during the day was to go and swim in the heated pool in Hartenbos.
Tuesday we dedicated to take a drive to Oudtshoorn as the wind picked up everyday taking away any chance of lying on the beach. We did the tourist thing and visited an ostrich farm and the Kango wildlife sanctuary.Stood on some ostrich eggs,
And even took a ride on one
We did go to the beach when the weather gave us a chance. But with the fairest Cape that is not always a possibility.
Hear is dropshot going down a dune.
Most of the days was spend going for a early walk on the beach and a swim in the afternoon. It was a relaxing week. Great granny is still strong but age is starting to take it toll. Walking up and down stairs is only achieved with great effort, she is only a mere 83 years old.
She enjoyed her great grandchildren for the week and spoiled them with stuff to munch everytime they walked into her house.
Hopefully if all goes well we will do so again next year.
Monday 28 September 2009
The Financial Crisis....The Solution...
It is August. In a small town on the South Coast of France the holiday season is in full swing, but it is raining so there is not too much business happening.
Everyone is heavily in debt.
Luckily, a rich Lithuanian tourist arrives in the foyer of the small local hotel. He asks for a room and puts a €100 note on the reception counter, takes a key and goes to inspect the room located up the stairs on the third floor.
The hotel owner takes the banknote in a hurry and rushes to his meat supplier to whom he owes €100.
The butcher takes the money and races to his supplier to pay his debt.
The wholesaler rushes to the farmer to pay €100 for pigs he purchased some time ago.
The farmer triumphantly gives the €100 note to a local prostitute who gave him her services on credit.
The prostitute goes quickly to the hotel, as she was owing the hotel for her hourly room use to entertain clients..
At that moment, the rich Lithuanian is coming down to reception. He informs the hotel owner that the proposed room is unsatisfactory. He takes back his €100 and departs.
There was no profit or income. But everyone no longer has any debt and the small townspeople look optimistically towards their future.
Everyone is heavily in debt.
Luckily, a rich Lithuanian tourist arrives in the foyer of the small local hotel. He asks for a room and puts a €100 note on the reception counter, takes a key and goes to inspect the room located up the stairs on the third floor.
The hotel owner takes the banknote in a hurry and rushes to his meat supplier to whom he owes €100.
The butcher takes the money and races to his supplier to pay his debt.
The wholesaler rushes to the farmer to pay €100 for pigs he purchased some time ago.
The farmer triumphantly gives the €100 note to a local prostitute who gave him her services on credit.
The prostitute goes quickly to the hotel, as she was owing the hotel for her hourly room use to entertain clients..
At that moment, the rich Lithuanian is coming down to reception. He informs the hotel owner that the proposed room is unsatisfactory. He takes back his €100 and departs.
There was no profit or income. But everyone no longer has any debt and the small townspeople look optimistically towards their future.
Tuesday 22 September 2009
Winston the Pigeon
As some of you might know, a company in Durban strapped a 4 gig card onto a Homer pigeon named Winston.
Open the office window and with Winston in the right hand clicked the mouse with the left hand , throw Winston out of the windows and see who wins.
The lazy overpriced voice and data supplier, better know as Telkom or Winston. Well I believe Winston came through flying.....
4 gig delivered and Telkom was something at 30% transmitted.
And Now the Solution from Telkom we all have been waiting for
Open the office window and with Winston in the right hand clicked the mouse with the left hand , throw Winston out of the windows and see who wins.
The lazy overpriced voice and data supplier, better know as Telkom or Winston. Well I believe Winston came through flying.....
4 gig delivered and Telkom was something at 30% transmitted.
And Now the Solution from Telkom we all have been waiting for
Friday 18 September 2009
Upcoming 2010 world cup
It has come to my attention that most of the people that will visit SA will not be able to understand the local population hence some tips on how to get along
A VITAL GUIDE TO SABC TV PRONUNCIATION
Put together to help foreigners understand African English.
Auw – Sorry, I didn’t know.
Beck - not the front
Beds - doves, vultures, etc.
Ben - to set alight
Begga – you buy at Mc Donnalds
Cheeps- Comes with the burger.
Cut - a small vehicle drawn by a donkey
Ebbon Erras - districts, (Urban areas)
Eh – Yes or no.
Eish- I buggered up something / I’ve got no idea.
Farra – Your dad
Feather - implies distance - Cape Town is feather than Johannesburg
Vok - pronged cutlery, often used with a knife.
Forranna – Someone from another country.
Gavamint – The people that tries to rule the country.
Guddin - around your house, where you grow plunts.
Get- A hinged opening in a fence
Hair - as opposed to him/ hiss.
Itch "itch and aviary pairsin"
Kennel - Army officer.
Len - to acquire knowledge
Marra - The Woman that is married to your Farra
Marram - Woman
Mills - Food on a plate
Pairsin- Human being
Pee-Pull – Human beings
Poh Pee-Pull - Financially challenged people
Phlegm - the hot part at the end of a candle
piepie – End of war, symbolised by white doves.
Straaik – There is one every week for people to lazy to work.
Suffa-Ring - as in "the pee-pull are suffa-ring"
Parrot Teksi - not a mamba of the teksi assoseshen (illegal taxi)
Soaka - Football, often played between Kaisa-Chiifs and Pie-rats.
Teksi - Mini Bus capable of carrying more people than a bus.
Toks - Negotiations
Weana - the winner takes all
Wekkas – they are supposed to do da wek (work)
Weld - The Earth
Wok - what you must learn to do before you can run.
As this is not enough it is crucial for the visitors to be able to recognize the work titles of the population
NEW JOB TITLES IN AFRICA in preparation for 2010!!!
Murderer : Population Stabilizer
Orphan : Independent Youngster
Beggar : Financial Gatherer
Cleaner : Hygiene Specialist
Gardener : Landscape Executive
House Maid : Family Environs Upkeep Manager
Receptionist :Front Office Manager/Office Access Control Specialist
Messenger : Business Communications Conveyer
Window Cleaner : Transparent Wall Technician
Temporary Teacher :Associate Tutor
Tea lady : Refreshment Overseer
Garbage Collector : Public Sanitation Technician
Watchman/security : Theft Prevention and Surveillance Officer or
Wealth Distribution Prevention Officer
Prostitute : Practical Sexual Relations Officer
Thief : Wealth Distribution Officer
Driver : Automobile Propulsion Specialist
Maid : Domestic Operations Specialist
Employee without Portfolio : Administration Manager
Cook : Food Preparation Officer
Unemployed :Township Management
Gossiping :Research Management
And then we must make them aware of the local Copy of Microsoft windows if they want to send that all important e-mail back home
The New South African edition may be recognised by looking at the opening screen. It reads "E-WEENDOWS 99" with a background picture of a Mageu bottle superimposed on a Orlando Pirates flag. It is shipped with a choice of a Black Label or a Toyota Hi-Ace screen saver.
New Features :
The buttons and icons are renamed as follows :-
OK - Sharp!
Cancel - Aikona
Undo- Hauk! meesteck!
Redo- Haikona, not meesteck!
Save- Ekke ek bere hom
Find - Ekke ek soek hom
Help - A'ishh/a'ngaazi
Run - Hamba
Personal folder - e-My theengs
Shut Down- Chaila
Caps Lock - e-Beeg letas
Escape - Bribe e-jaila
Home - e-Kaya mina
End - e-Feeneesh
Delete - e-Wipe-out
Some programs that are exclusive to "E Weendows 99"
e-MS Wed - a word processor
e-Celculata - calculator
e-Scretch peppa- notepad
e-Jive Box- CD player
e-Explora - Microsoft Internet Explorer
e-Pikcha - a graphics viewer
e-Stockvel- M/S accounting software
Also note :
The Recycle Bin is labelled e-Mampara
Control Panel is known as Don' taach dees buttens!
Then if this is not confusing the crap out of them they must be aware of what the SA government structure is.
A VITAL GUIDE TO SABC TV PRONUNCIATION
Put together to help foreigners understand African English.
Auw – Sorry, I didn’t know.
Beck - not the front
Beds - doves, vultures, etc.
Ben - to set alight
Begga – you buy at Mc Donnalds
Cheeps- Comes with the burger.
Cut - a small vehicle drawn by a donkey
Ebbon Erras - districts, (Urban areas)
Eh – Yes or no.
Eish- I buggered up something / I’ve got no idea.
Farra – Your dad
Feather - implies distance - Cape Town is feather than Johannesburg
Vok - pronged cutlery, often used with a knife.
Forranna – Someone from another country.
Gavamint – The people that tries to rule the country.
Guddin - around your house, where you grow plunts.
Get- A hinged opening in a fence
Hair - as opposed to him/ hiss.
Itch "itch and aviary pairsin"
Kennel - Army officer.
Len - to acquire knowledge
Marra - The Woman that is married to your Farra
Marram - Woman
Mills - Food on a plate
Pairsin- Human being
Pee-Pull – Human beings
Poh Pee-Pull - Financially challenged people
Phlegm - the hot part at the end of a candle
piepie – End of war, symbolised by white doves.
Straaik – There is one every week for people to lazy to work.
Suffa-Ring - as in "the pee-pull are suffa-ring"
Parrot Teksi - not a mamba of the teksi assoseshen (illegal taxi)
Soaka - Football, often played between Kaisa-Chiifs and Pie-rats.
Teksi - Mini Bus capable of carrying more people than a bus.
Toks - Negotiations
Weana - the winner takes all
Wekkas – they are supposed to do da wek (work)
Weld - The Earth
Wok - what you must learn to do before you can run.
As this is not enough it is crucial for the visitors to be able to recognize the work titles of the population
NEW JOB TITLES IN AFRICA in preparation for 2010!!!
Murderer : Population Stabilizer
Orphan : Independent Youngster
Beggar : Financial Gatherer
Cleaner : Hygiene Specialist
Gardener : Landscape Executive
House Maid : Family Environs Upkeep Manager
Receptionist :Front Office Manager/Office Access Control Specialist
Messenger : Business Communications Conveyer
Window Cleaner : Transparent Wall Technician
Temporary Teacher :Associate Tutor
Tea lady : Refreshment Overseer
Garbage Collector : Public Sanitation Technician
Watchman/security : Theft Prevention and Surveillance Officer or
Wealth Distribution Prevention Officer
Prostitute : Practical Sexual Relations Officer
Thief : Wealth Distribution Officer
Driver : Automobile Propulsion Specialist
Maid : Domestic Operations Specialist
Employee without Portfolio : Administration Manager
Cook : Food Preparation Officer
Unemployed :Township Management
Gossiping :Research Management
And then we must make them aware of the local Copy of Microsoft windows if they want to send that all important e-mail back home
The New South African edition may be recognised by looking at the opening screen. It reads "E-WEENDOWS 99" with a background picture of a Mageu bottle superimposed on a Orlando Pirates flag. It is shipped with a choice of a Black Label or a Toyota Hi-Ace screen saver.
New Features :
The buttons and icons are renamed as follows :-
OK - Sharp!
Cancel - Aikona
Undo- Hauk! meesteck!
Redo- Haikona, not meesteck!
Save- Ekke ek bere hom
Find - Ekke ek soek hom
Help - A'ishh/a'ngaazi
Run - Hamba
Personal folder - e-My theengs
Shut Down- Chaila
Caps Lock - e-Beeg letas
Escape - Bribe e-jaila
Home - e-Kaya mina
End - e-Feeneesh
Delete - e-Wipe-out
Some programs that are exclusive to "E Weendows 99"
e-MS Wed - a word processor
e-Celculata - calculator
e-Scretch peppa- notepad
e-Jive Box- CD player
e-Explora - Microsoft Internet Explorer
e-Pikcha - a graphics viewer
e-Stockvel- M/S accounting software
Also note :
The Recycle Bin is labelled e-Mampara
Control Panel is known as Don' taach dees buttens!
Then if this is not confusing the crap out of them they must be aware of what the SA government structure is.
Thursday 17 September 2009
Doctor Fishman.....
Hopefully Max will feel a bit better after DR Fishman have prescribed a couple of Millers to try and to attend to his current depressed pissed off state of mind.
The only thing that might be of concern is that I could not get my patient to drink the prescribed amount of said Millers.
He only had about three and I could have sworn the prescription said a minimum of Six. He babbled something about a conference call. But next time maybe I will fair better.
Thanks boet enjoyed the drinks....
The only thing that might be of concern is that I could not get my patient to drink the prescribed amount of said Millers.
He only had about three and I could have sworn the prescription said a minimum of Six. He babbled something about a conference call. But next time maybe I will fair better.
Thanks boet enjoyed the drinks....
Wednesday 16 September 2009
Daddy longlegs
A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden..
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.
He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention.
He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating..
'Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?' she asked.
'They're mating,' her father replied.
'What do you call the spider on top?' she asked.
'That's a Daddy Longlegs,' her father answered.
'So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?' the little girl asked.
'No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.'
'The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then
lifted her foot and stomped them flat.
'Well, we're not having any of that gay kak in OUR garden' she said.
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.
He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention.
He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating..
'Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?' she asked.
'They're mating,' her father replied.
'What do you call the spider on top?' she asked.
'That's a Daddy Longlegs,' her father answered.
'So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?' the little girl asked.
'No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.'
'The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then
lifted her foot and stomped them flat.
'Well, we're not having any of that gay kak in OUR garden' she said.
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