Born to Fish

2012

2012-01-09T20:08:00.002+02:00

Well it is 2012 and another year is in the making!   I am still trying to figure out where 2011 went.   But with that the year starting the first thing I did - my one and only new years resolution - was to book and and organise the Annual Kosi bay fishing team get together.

It will be a held this year at...........Kosi bay. We have not been to it in years so it seems fitting that we go back. So DM grandpa if you can make it I can change the bookings.   It is only a 2000km drive for you!

On the work front I have moved out from IT into the project management world.   I still do not know if it was a good move....I will know in the next month or so.   If it does plan out it will look impressive on my CV as the current client is getting a lot of media attention at the moment.

So to all of you have a good year and I will put post again before the year is finished.

I promise!

Why don't you have a blackberry?

2011-10-12T14:15:00.002+02:00

As I said before, they are shit devices and that is why I do not own one. That is why I do not own any Apple products either. The little thing about proprietary software is for me a no go! Do anybody buy a computer nowadays with only the suppliers prefered Operating system on it with applications locked to some online store?

Nope they don't...

So why the fuck do you rely on a piece of software on a device that you are more reliant on than your PC? I hear about people Jail breaking their Apple devices to change them to suit their needs? Why ? Why did you not get an Android device which you can change as you please? Oh now wait, the late Mr Jobs made them status symbols. I wonder what was the Blackberry's claim to fame?

But to all you idiots who are suffering with your BB's! I have told you so! They are shit!

Heaven will never be the same again.

2011-10-10T15:52:00.004+02:00

Last week Jobs was introduced!

Life going at Warp speed!

2011-10-04T21:39:00.002+02:00

I went to Capetown last week on business for two days. Naturally I had to go and have a drink or six with DMDa......sorry Grandpa. We met in Campsbay and waited for my cousin to joun us for a quick beer or two.   As i sat their enjoying the finest from Namibia I sat and tried to remepember when was the last time we saw one another.

It was to long. Damn we have not fished together in more than two years now!   Even on the home front socialising with friend has gone from every now and again to maybe once every two months. Well I had not had a beer with The Soufafrican in months.   Other close friends I last had a drink with was when we went hunting!   WTF!!! That is 3 months ago!

I think that life in Johannesburg is showing us the bad side of life.   It is time that we make some time to go out and have a drink or just a quick face to face chat every now and again.

To my friend in Isreal, Hey what can we say!   Once a year if we are lucky!

A new toy.......

2011-09-26T20:53:00.001+02:00

I installed a new toy on Saturday. A 40" Sony Bravia LED high def tv, screen or monitor. I got this very nice tv from work as thank you gift/commision for a project that I worked on. Well thank you very much.

Saturdaywith the help off Dropshot we drilled some holes in the wall to fit a wall mounting bracket as I did not see a very long life for it on its measly stand with my two brats running around in the house. So holes drilled and bracket level, tv installed.

Now just to figure out how stop HQ from watching Survivor and it will be even better. Only drawback now is to get all the HD goodies to get the full potential out of it...... Eish.

To Drill or not to Drill!

2011-09-20T12:49:00.000+02:00

What the heck, Lets drill it. After much contemplation I drilled some holes in my old Hilux. I must admit I pondered for about 3 hours measuring and re-measuring everything over and over. And they say woodworking is hard. Well after I was damn sure - not really - out came the punch and I marked the holes.

Out with the drill and whola!!!!

The marking of the bracket on the post was next with three holes to pop rivet the bracket to the post.

And the result!!!!!

All Snorkeled up feeding clean air to the engine! I always wanted to fit one but at the local prices it was
just plain ridiculous to pay R8000.00 for a plastic pipe.

This one was imported by a member on the Hilux forum and it set me back R1800. Still a lot of money for a plastic pipe......But it just looks awesome!

This new updated streamlined

2011-09-14T20:26:00.000+02:00

updating feature sucks!   It just does not look right. But then again that is the way it goes with all applications that one use. We do not like change.

I have also decided that facebook is a bunch of shite.   I have not been on it for close on to three weeks. I went on yesterday and guess what? Nothing has changed. Still the same, some friends trying to sound deep and mysterious with posts that would have made Confucius proud.

Other friends are trying to show there Christian side of life, do not know what to make about that. Or I would rather keep my opinion to myself.

And then we have the whiners.  Sorry ne I think I might take up blogging again instead of doing the Facebook thing.   At least I can whine on the blog for hours on end as I do not really give a shit on how I my two reader get through it.

So Goodbye Facebook I have real friends!

Halllllloooooooooooooo

2011-09-13T20:47:00.000+02:00

I wonder if someone is going to leave a comment.......

It has been going extremely well with me lately. I am in an overall better mood and the only reason is that I have decided to only read the headlines in the news. So I know that old Juju is still giving everybody shit and also does not give a shit to what court says.

I know that our dearest President is to lame to stand up against corruption cause he is most probably just as corrupt. Can't point fingers now can he.....?

I am doing very well at work and have started to move in a total different direction. Although I am still trying to cling to the technical stuff. I like software as long as it is not written by the evil fucking Empire! Microsoft for those that do not know.

On the home front my children is getting big to fast, but I believe that is the way it goes....

So to whoever might have stumbled on this post!!! Have a fucking good one!

Winter..........

2011-06-05T19:56:00.000+02:00

What did I do for the whole Sunday. Sat ever so silently all by myself and loaded up 30 precisely measured rounds! I just need to get to the range this week to go and test them.

One month then it is hunting time!

Publish Post

Why bother....

2011-05-31T07:03:00.000+02:00

I have contemplated over the last couple of weeks if I should send this blog to the the great blog dustbin!
But then again I might keep it for the odd post. It is as if it has lost most of the day to day ramblings appeal to other social sites.

Well I think I will keep it till such time that Google deletes it due to inactivity. (Wonder if they do that?)

But congrats to my two friend who have taken a little run on Sunday and completed the comrades. You are of your rockers to go and run the whole fucking day....

Fishing Week!

2011-03-22T11:43:00.000+02:00

The Arrangements for our upcoming trip is slowly but surely falling into place.   For this trip I am the catering manager once again. Must be something to do with my cooking abbilities.

The meat for this trip is a nightmare as I am not allowed to cross the Botswana border with any meat from South Africa. So i had to organise meat in Go babies also known as Gobabis. To my surprise this was actually a great move as meat in Namibia in nearly half the price of what we pay in Johannesburg.

Arrangements was made with the butcher to drop the meat of at the guesthouse where we are going to overnight.   Problem solved.

Now the only thing I still need to do is buy all the dry rations for the trip.

On the Hilux front I got my old van back last week and it is going like it never went since I own it.   I eventually got around to having a fuel management system installed in it.   It no longer looses speed on some of the major uphills on the N14 between PTA and Krugersdorp. The only thing I need to test now is the fuel economy.

Since my last long trip with it I also installed a long range tank. It now carries 120 litters of fuel. So 120 x 9.something..... Ouch a lot of money to get it full.

So only 4 more sleeps then it is ....

Gone Fishing!

Die Blou Hond

2011-03-04T08:54:00.000+02:00

Last night we where at Die Blou Hond (The blue dog) and establishment created by Phillip Moolman and his wife Susan Coetzer. Both well known South African Artists/Actors. They promote local Afrikaans singers. They have converted their house into this cosy 100 seater establishment.

Last night we attended a show with South African legend Koos Kombuis. And if you attend a Koos show you have to drink copious amounts of red wine. Which we did. Somehow my head is still reflecting on that. It was brilliant. The host Phillip made the night and Koos was the good bottle of wine with a lovely meal.

Talking about food. The tickets are prised at R250 a head which includes a three course meal. I had mushroom soup as a starter. The food is presented in a....take a guess.

Jip in Dog bowl!

After Koos has done his thing we where treated to another 30 minutes by the host Phillip who had a birthday request to which he obliged. He sang the cover of Leonard Cohens Haleluja. Brilliant!

After that the night was done and so where we after a couple of bottles of wine. I will definitely go again!

The following headline/

2011-03-01T14:04:00.000+02:00

article had me of my chair.
Zuma to get French pomp

Clearly the editor has missed the Afrikaans meaning of this. Does this mean he is not pomping enough in South Africa? Must be hard to be married to a bunch of woman. Now you have to go and pomp abroad! Wonder if the the showers in France would be adequate?

Calm down....

2011-03-01T09:48:00.000+02:00

How weird that my faithfull readers got their panties in a twist when I mentioned an interview at a lovely International company which will not be named. But they are part of the Brotherhood of Magicians if I can say that much.

I do no think I will fit into that organisation as I will really be fired in a couple of weeks. I speak my mind whenever I want. Politics? Why must we do red tape politics when working? Bull shit! Tell it like it is and more things will get done.

Especially as I am technical minded and I do not see politics playing a factor at implementing software.Do you have the money for it? Can you afford it being implemented? Yes to the above and we will put a plan together and implement it. Can it have maybes in that equation, not really. So fuck off with your politics!

And untie your panties!

Gatiep

2011-02-25T13:25:00.002+02:00

Gatiep goes into a bar to have himself a cold one.
Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the bar and asked," Who owns
the dog tied under that tree outside?"
Gatiep said it was his.
Your dog seems to be in heat the officer said.
Gatiep replied, "No way... She's cool 'cause she's tied up under that
shade tree."
The policeman said, "No! You don't understand. Your dog needs to be
bred."
No way, said Gatiep. "That dog doesn't need bread. She isn't hungry
'cause I fed her this morning'."
The exasperated policeman said, "NO! You don't understand; your dog
wants to have sex!"
(You gotta love this!!!!)
Gatiep looked at the cop and said, "Well, go ahead. I always wanted a
police dog.

Hey useless!!! Post something!

2011-02-22T13:49:00.000+02:00

Sorry to all my valued followers of this tremendous successful blog.     I have not posted anything lately as I am not in a real blogging mood.   I have intentionally decided that all my posts in this blog in fairly negative and not really a release valve of my temper and disappointments.

And it is not fun....

When this blog was started it was dedicated to put a bit of emphasis on our corrupt politicians.   If I want to continue with that I would have to employee a couple of people to write for me. That is also part of my depression in this wonderful country.   It is being destroyed and everybody is to shit scared to take a stand against a government that is slowly but surely busy to enforce reverse apartheid.

Some people also in their defence do not know that they are voting for a bunch of scumbags. So we are screwed.   What is this country going to be like in a next ten years? Maybe the Western Cape will be independent as I already see people calling for that. That will take us back again 200 years.   Now that will be an interesting thing....

Well, in my personal life little dropshot is doing great in athletics and has proofed that she is the 4th quickest grade R girl in the westrand over 60 meters.   She just missed a third place to go to the next level! It must be all the times that have I chased her around trying to give her a hiding that is paying of dividends now.

My working environment is also pissing me of slightly as we are being handled like children. I am no child anymore and know what is expected of me.   So please.   And what pisses me of is that policies are changed around every corner that is in total conflict of my arrangement two years ago when I was head hunted by them.

Still on the job front, as I was asked for an interview at a company that some fellow bloggers now to well. I am going to go for that interview but believe you and me I will factor 5 years worth of increases into my salary if you want to employ me. And then I might maybe consider.   What do you think?

I also have to play catchup for idiots at work who is to shit lazy to do the technical documentation on their projects! What the Fuck! Why did you not get any written warnings for a job not completed?   Yet you demand 600k a year?   Now that picture is so fucking wrong.   For that amount of money for a technical resource you must walk on water and piss good grade single malt whisky. Now I have to mop up after you?

That rope just might one day run out and I am going to be there to see you hang yourself. Maybe...

How many French Legionares...

2011-01-21T09:48:00.000+02:00

will it take to bring South Africa to its knees?

Look like only one and his missus. I have followed this story and stil can't believe it. Go and have a read.

Fugitive couple found in bullet-riddled room

It took 85 task force members to eventually kill them. What is even more of a joke it took them 6 days to find them 500 meters away from where the crime occurred.    Imagine if the hiked a kilometre into the mountains. They would have been missing for months.

So all I need is one French Legion section to take over South Africa. How fucken sad is that.

Clearly they also just went into the house guns a blazing. Close your eyes and pull the trigger! No more such imperialistic SWAT shit as acquiring the target, identifying the threat and give him the well trained double tap.

And that after they have chucked two stun grenades into the house.   Fucking idiots.

They even have a picture of some member of the force with an LMG!   Why can't they use those against casg in transit robbers.   Maybe because the transit robbers will shoot back.   The more I think about this the more I realise how poorly trained these clowns are.

Back in a day two Recces would have sorted this sort of thing out without firing a shot.

But well this is Friday and if we are in Invaded by Zimbabwe tomorrow, Good luck!

The start of a new year

2011-01-04T09:30:00.000+02:00

I did not start this year on a very good note. I had a bit of a fall out with one of my best friends.   Our friendship deteriorated over the last couple of months.   I had a small tiff with him in November and then last week was the final straw.

I have decided that this relationship has ended. It has been 23 years.   What a fucking start it can only get better. I hope...

Well I did play a lot of golf at the end of December and decided that it is time to kick-start my amateur golfing career again. I used to play quite a lot of golf at some stage and even dropped as low as a 12 handicap.   I will over the next couple of weeks start to phone the clubs and enquire on joining fees.   Another option is to join the playmore golf with vodacom.   It is an option maybe later.

On the work front the next three months will mostly be reserved for training into a new software direction. I also have to do a couple more certifications. As long as they are paying I will definitly not say no! I still have to fit in a fishing trip in March. so I hope to have all of this done by then.

So good luck to you all for the year ahead and hopefully tight lines and low handicaps...

The Pizza saga

2010-12-30T14:46:00.000+02:00

Two days ago I go into the Debonairs at Lifestyle crossing and order my favorite debonairs pizza. A meaty Filla.

As I take the first bite I get this weird piece of sliced sausage thing that tastes like card board with tamato sauce. What the fuck is this....

Being the whining type I go back and ask for the manager. The manager aprroaches with a head covering....Ag Fuck.....

Other people's religion is being forced down upon me.... It is Macon. some weird Halaal thing. I make piece with my error and eat the cardboard meat.

But....

Next time I will make damn sure if the place is halaal or not. I expect a halaal store in for instance Fordsburg or Lenasia but around the corner from me. No thank you.

Please consider that I am a meat-aterian and I am not happy to be forced to partake in religion activities...

The Long Awaited, delayed Umngazi report

2010-12-10T09:07:00.000+02:00

I went fishing in the Transkei over the last two years for our yearly boys away week. To the detriment of HQ who was not happy as she has never been to the Transkei.

So to show her the Transkei I booked ourselves into Umngazi River bungalows. We have heard quite lot of the place from our neighbour and friends. We decided to drive down and overnight somewhere in the Northern Cape. Why? We just felt like it and it would add some adventure to the trip.

So on the Sunday morning HQ's mommy mover was
packed to the proverbial rafters.

So let the long drive commence. We decided (as mentioned) that we will go via the Northern Cape as HQ have not seen this part of the country.

It is a stunning piece of the world with rolling green grass hills as you pass below the Mountain Kingdom of Lesotho.

Absolutely awesome place...No pics of that though...

We have a set of In Car DVD's that we hook up for the kids to make longer trips a bit bearable. I forgot to place the socks over the back windows so they had to contend with a bit of glare on the screens. No problem. They got a plan....

So we drove till about 5 that afternoon and reached Aliwal North.   We started to look for a place to sleep that evening. We drove to one or two guest houses but HQ was not happy with the look of some of them.

So we ended up at the Old Mill Inn, which was built in 1895 as a flour mill for the district of Barkly East. It has been remodelled into a hotel with an old time Victorian feel to it. Then the search for food was on.   No food at the hotel as they did not have kitchen staff.

We drove around in Barkly looking for a take-away store. We found one as as we walked in the owner told us that the kitchen is closed.   The only option then was a little cafe on the corner. We got some bread, viennas, bully beef and yoghurt. I had a blast with supper but my family was not to impressed. Food is food.

My daughter was not impressed with Barkly as the tv in the room had only three channels you can't buy anything in town. Totally unacceptable to her standards.

The two Dropshots enjoyed the idea of staying in an old hotel and caused havoc till they went to bed. Jumping on the beds, running in the passages and up and down the stairs.

I think I saw a ghost or two in the passages late at night.   Or maybe it was the Whisky. Who knows.

The Next morning we got up early played around in the old little hotel and then they gave us breakfast.   This was the highlight of the trip so far. FOOOOOD!!

We left and continued on to Umtata. The owner of the Old Mill said we should go to Ugi after Elliot and then we will see a road after the Spar with the directions blanked of on the the board. This according to him is a brand new road that was constructed by PG Bison. PG bison makes boards.

So we went that route. What a fucking road! If all roads where like that in this country we all would have walked. Our licences would have been provoked for speeding ages ago.   The turns are banked with perfect arc degrees. I was impressed.   Then it went down the mountain! I was even impressed more.

As we got to the outskirts of Umtata Dropshot looks out of the windows and asks her mother.
"Why is it so Dirty?"
HQ look at her and give the political correct answer that these people do not clean after them and do not mind the rubbish lying around.
Then we get into Umtata.

They drive without stopping at lights and the place is dirty no fucking filthy. Dropshot's next question...
"Are their any normal people living here?"

Uhm ....No my dear their ain't any normal people living here. The mounth of a child......

So we carried on and arrived at Umngazi. Booked in had lunch and unpacked.

The view from our bungalow was stunning. We could see the ocean and the Lagoon.   The mouth was closed and the water line was up very high. The water was a couple of inches below the pier at the launch site. It started to rain that evening.

The next morning when we got up. No water mssing gone, out to sea....

What the .... was a good response.

My favourite thing at Umngazi was the showers. Build outside the bungalows. The following pic was the view I had from the shower.

We also did the mandatory playing on the beach

And the dropshots enjoyed the dunes. I did not cause I had to carry them up everytime they slided down.

Tackling the massive dune. No problem at two years old.

And sis also enjoyed the dunes.

It was an awesome trip. Food was great. They even had a dining lounge for the children with decent home cooked food. No such crap as protein and chips. That was to us something that we liked a lot about the place.

In the evenings they had a nanny service so that we could enjoy supper by ourselves. The children was kept occupied in a playroom while we ate. The food in the evenings was brilliant.

More importantly the booze was very well priced. R18 for most of the cocktails. R12 for a Windhoek Draught. Bargain!!!!!!!!!!!.

The Bungalows from the dunes.

And then the long drive back to Shite town commenced again and it was all over....

Please send them my way...

2010-12-07T09:33:00.000+02:00

The BARBARIANS......

Lets comment....

2010-12-07T07:13:00.000+02:00

Lets be clear on one thing.    I am a racists and it gets worse and worse everyday.   Why?    Quite simple go through our daily news.    Why would anyone shoot a three year old child?    Will I with my racist tendencies shoot a three year old black girl?

For sure not.    The only innocence we have in this world is children does not matter what the race. Then you get fucking barbarians in our society with such amount of hate that they will execute a toddler. And if you come to me and said it because you are poor....Please fuck off!

I have been to other poor African countries and those people does not fucking behave like the ones in South Africa.

And what was the ANC's response to this.    Nothing!   It is part of their heritage as they are trying to prove in court to have the shoot the boer song declared legal.

Bring back the rope!

No Comment....

2010-12-03T11:48:00.001+02:00

Caddy comments

2010-11-19T13:54:00.001+02:00

# 10
Golfer: Think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.
Caddy: Think you can keep your head down that long.
#9
Golfer: I`d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddy: Try heaven, you`ve already moved most of the earth.
# 8
Golfer: Do you think my game is improving.
Caddy: Yes sir, you miss the ball much close now.
#7
Golfer: Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?
Caddy: Eventually.
#6
Golfer: You`ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.
Caddy: I don`t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence.
#5
Golfer: Please stop checking your watch all the time, It too much of a distraction.
Caddy: It`s not a watch – it`s a compass.
#4
Golfer: How do you like my game?
Caddy: Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf.
#3
Golfer: Do you think it`s a sin to play on Sunday?
Caddy: The way you play, sir, it`s a sin on any day.
#2
Golfer: This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.
Caddy: This isn`t the golf course, we left that an hour ago.

And #1 best caddy comment.
Golfer: That can`t be my ball, it`s too old,
Caddy: It`s been a long time since we teed off, sir.

My model sister

2010-11-16T08:32:00.000+02:00

My sister has started her own blog. She is a model travelling around the globe from fashion show to fashion show.. Hopefully with the blog (If she keeps it up to date) I will have a idea of where in the world she is.

Good luck Sis and enjoy!

The link is on the right... Mea's World.

I went fishing yesterday afternoon....

2010-11-03T09:45:00.000+02:00

at the vaal but after a while I ran out of bait.

Then I saw a puffadder with a dead lizard in its mouth.

Lizards are good bait for bass.

Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the lizard in its mouth,

I grabbed it right behind the head, took the lizard,

and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bitten.

So, I grabbed my bottle of Klipdrift and poured a little brandy into its mouth.

His eyes rolled back, and he went limp. I then released him without

incident and carried on fishing, using the lizard as bait.
A little while later, I felt a nudge against my foot.

I looked down and there was that same snake

with two more lizards in its mouth.

Life is good in Africa.

Courses....

2010-10-28T20:35:00.000+02:00

It is hard work sitting in a course listening to somebody reading the course material for you. How does this actually help. Can't I get the course material and student exercises and do it on my own time? Nah what about the R20 000 that we are charging.

I have just completed another 4 day course today and will go and try to write the certification next week. This is becoming a joke. I am busy reeling in software certifications just to be in a position to sell the products to some of my customers.

So from this day hence I can add a title or two to my name something like Fishman, VCP, CLP,CLS, MCSE, MCP, ATS....

WTF?

That will also work!

Faith....

2010-10-21T08:44:00.000+02:00

So Woolworths who sells clothing and upmarket groceries decides to drop 5 Christian magazines from their shelves.

Why would a retailer do such a thing?

The whole Christian community is up in arms about and and threaten to boycott woollies for such utter disregard of their faith. Comments on news articles in the media make it quite clear that it is war.

So why would it be dropped from the shelves.

Maybe all these so called Christians never bought one single one! People complain now but woollies keeps Halaal products. Yes they do but the Halaal stuff sells. After all they are in the market to make profit. They are a retailer and not some church.

In any event I am with woollies on this one. Anybody who have read a Bible should no that you must not use the Christian faith for financial gain.

And if any of you disagree with me, please tell and I will give you a couple of examples to go and read in your faiths manual.

GO WOOLLIES!!!!

Dammit

2010-10-12T08:15:00.000+02:00

This morning I was asked to give a place with the name Angels place a call to assist with an IT problem they have. The request was made to me by a fellow Hilux forum member and the message read:

Can you please call Antoinette the principal.

So I think no problem and I call her.

They have a house who looks after neglected and abused children.

Fuckit.....

I do not like to see children in this situation. I think about my two spoilt brats and I can't help myself to get emotional. But not sad....

Plain forward nasty murderous thoughts enter my mind as to how the parents could do that to them. I will have to go their and assist them setting up three machines that was donated to them. I just know that I am not going
to sleep well after that.

Fuckit....

Life continues....

2010-10-12T07:41:00.000+02:00

with the same boring pace as before.    At work we had a meeting as well and in this meeting they promised a 10% share for our team on everything we make above margin.   So that means a 2.5% commission for me.

Now they just have to clearly state those margins.   And with the fucking bean counters we have it is always a fucking mission.   So the chances of seeing any extra money is far and few in between. But thanks for the gesture.

I really can't complain about my current employer. So far I am having a good time and they are trying to look well after us. 10% increases per annum can't be complained about.

I just need to start to do something new.   That has also been given to me yesterday in the shape of getting certified in the IBM Tivoli product suite.   It seems that I will be stuck in technical software implementation for another couple of years.

Damn.......

Why do SA police officers wear reflective vests?

2010-10-05T06:53:00.000+02:00

It is another week

2010-09-29T14:17:00.000+02:00

Another day, another month....

What the fuck....

I am getting bored with the same shit over and over again....

Resemblance

2010-09-23T06:48:00.000+02:00

I do not care what they say, THAT looks nothing like me!!

Moving banks....

2010-09-23T06:43:00.000+02:00

Next week this process will be completed.    I am just waiting for this months salary to run into the ABSA account and then it is done.

I have moved to FNB. Why cause they where the first to respond on an e-mail that I have send.

I copied Nedbank, Standard, Capitec and FNB into a mail requesting that I want to move my accounts.

FNB responded in under two hours.   A hour later a Transmission account was opened. I completed one form and they would move all my debit orders for me.

For the bond,   they might take that immediately and settle the fine at ABSA. But she said she will get back to me on that. I can wait three months.   But I am not going to pay a penalty out of my pocket to dearest ABSA.

So far so good......

Goodbye ABSA

2010-09-20T07:39:00.000+02:00

I have banked all my working life at ABSA.   Why?   It just happened to be the bank that my first employer endorsed. Then it was Volkskas Bank. All our claims and so forth was paid at an in-house Volkskas branch. Take your signed claim from your manager to the teller and she debited your account.

What a fucking schlep looking back at it.

Then ABSA was created by merging 4 of banks. And hence I became an ABSA client.

Now one thing that has white people fuming in a silent way is the race laws in this country. Still do not see any foreigners trying to boycott SA for this. Oh I forgot Black on white racism does not exist.   Anycase, ABSA sponsors the Currie Cup.   A local provisional rugby tournament. And then last week they made the mistake
to play the political game.

We need to transform rugby! In other words, we need more black players in a white dominated sport. Why do we not give a fuck about the 11 black people in the Bafana squad. Cause black people like soccer more than whites in this shite hole. So make fucking peace with it!

But ABSA's black appointed BEE,BBEEE Happy Ntshingila, executive director for marketing and corporate affairs,popped out of SARU's trenches guns a blazing and said that ABSA the Sponsor supports racist transformation.

Well Happy, you are going to be a very unhappy fellow.   In white culture normally the best person for the job rule applies.   And guess what?    ABSA is no longer the best person for the Job in my books.

I will during the course of the morning go past an FNB or Nedbank.   Ask them to transfer all my Debt across to them.   I will give you notice of my Bond cancellation and have that moved in three months to avoid your penalties.

And no, I do not think you care about our money, But our Debt!

What was that about compounded interest.........

WHY!!!

2010-09-17T08:31:00.002+02:00

Spinning

2010-09-14T18:19:00.000+02:00

After the last fishing trip I decided I enjoy spinning more than throwing bait.   You get stuck quite a lot in the
Transkei due to the nature of the coast. With spinning, well you get your spoon, plug or lure back after every cast.

So I decided that I need a 9 foot rod with a coffee grinder that can cast 3 -4 ounce spoons or plugs.

Today I have order a 300/1 Purglas three piece blank.   I will take this blank to a rod builder I know to make the but according to my specs.

Next year I will fish with this rod while we are in Namibia.   I will take the 14ft rods for backup.

BEE for dummies....

2010-09-14T18:12:00.000+02:00

Shortly after class, an economics student approaches his economics professor and says, "I don't understand the point of BEE. Can you explain it to me?"

The professor replied, "I don't have any time to explain it at my office, but if you come over to my house on Saturday and help me with my weekend project, I'll be glad to explain it to you." The student agreed.

At the agreed-upon time, the student showed up at the professor's house. The professor stated that the weekend project involved his backyard pool. They both went out back to the pool, and the professor handed the student a bucket. Demonstrating with his own bucket, the professor said, "First, go over to the deep end, and fill your bucket with as much water as you can." The student did as he was instructed.

The professor then continued, "Follow me over to the shallow end, and then dump all the water from your bucket into it." The student was naturally confused, but did as he was told. The professor then explained they were going to do this many more times, and began walking back to the deep end of the pool.

The confused student asked, "Excuse me, but why are we doing this?"

The professor matter-of-factly stated that he was trying to make the shallow end much deeper.

The student didn't think the economics professor was serious, but figured that he would find out the real story soon enough. However, after the 6th trip between the shallow end and the deep end, the student began to become worried that his economics professor had gone mad.

The student finally blurted out, "All we're doing is wasting valuable time and effort on unproductive pursuits. Even worse, when this process is all over, everything will be at the same level it was before, so all you'll really have accomplished is the destruction of what could have been truly productive action!"

The professor put down his bucket and replied with a smile, "Congratulations. You now understand BEE"

Increase....

2010-09-10T09:20:00.000+02:00

I asked my employer:

Where do I go to collect my R1000,00 housing allowance & my 8.6% general salary increase for this year?"

The employer said:

“Come here and have a look, you’ll find it here”! .

Learn Chinese

2010-09-09T12:29:00.000+02:00

I had a post years ago on how to pronounce certain chinese words. It was titled learn chinese in 5 minutes.

According to the stats on my blog it is the most viewed post......

What makes this more signigicant is that the Chinese to not speak Chinese....

More tax on the Horizon....

2010-09-08T14:20:00.000+02:00

I see more taxes for the middle class

President Jacob Zuma on Tuesday called on the education department to fast-track the implementation of free education to all learners of public schools, the SABC reported.

Or maybe they will just print more money to pay salaries and build schools.....

Gun Licences

2010-09-02T12:45:00.000+02:00

I get a call from Sergeant whatever from the police firearms registry.

Sarge "Do you know a Missus HQ?"

Me "Uhm yes I do."

Sarge "What kind of a person is she?"

Me "Uhm...She is white, blond hair, blue eyes...."

Sarge "uhm no sir, do you think she may have a gun"

Me "No!"

Sarge "Why?"

Me "Cause she must be able to have as many as she fucking like!"

Sarge " Ohhh ok, so you do not mind if she has a gun!"

Me " Uhm no!"

Now for the nice fucking part in this whole story.

Sarge " Can you please send me a picture of your safe?"

Me "Why?"

Sarge "So that we know you have a safe"

Me......Fucking speechless.....

Sarge " Can you?"

Me " Yes I will no probs" wondering how many images for safes google will return!

Now that is how the new gun law is going! They can't implement it anymore as planned and now they are taking shortcuts!

Fucking idiots.

The neigbour-hood watch.

2010-08-31T07:49:00.000+02:00

I have joined the local neighbour-hood watch after the incident we had in our street.   Last night I did my patrol in our area.   I cruised the area at an avarage speed of about 20k's an hour.   I stopped three times and pressed the intercoms of clowns with gates wide open at 12:30 in the morning.

When I pressed the first intercom I wondered what the response is going to be from the person living their.

Well the first one, after 5 minutes a light came on and then seeing that I am from the neighbour-hood watch (We actually have a yellow emergency light on the car) The man came out thanked me and mumbled something about killing his son.   He closed his gate and so I proceeded down the street.

The other two they did not even bother to thank me.   They just closed their gates.   Mission accomplished.

I felt quite good when I returned home.   Two hours of my time a week just to show that we have a presence in the area and that we are doing something, priceless.

Which was also quite nice is that in our area of patrol I passed two other private vehicles with the flashing yellow light.   That is three people going around 20 blocks just to show we are looking after our patch of land.   It is sad in one way. But this is South Africa, a beautiful cuntree.

Lead SA....

2010-08-23T20:53:00.000+02:00

This is an initiative brought to you by 702 a local radio station. I believe they have set this up so that people can stand up and lead SA. They have all this positive mentality that they want to project out to people that South Africa can be a success.

And if you hear them speak they actually believe it. They have mission statements, call to action and a marketing campaign.

Now how can one group of people be so negative. We have so called BBBEE (Broad based black empowerment) laws in South Africa to empower the previously disadvantaged. A very big business transaction is on the cards between Sishen and Lonmin. One of the biggest Iron ore producers.

The beneficiaries for this deal for the BEE portion is one of Jacobs Zuma's sons. He is going to have to settle for a measly R1 Billion rand for completing a form. Now this deal is complying with BBBEE. The time is ripe that this must be changed to NEE ( In Afrikaans No) In English obviously Narrow economic empowerment. The analysts reckon it will take two years to correct investor confidence because of this.

Then we have things like AARTO, Administrative Adjudication of Road Traffic Offences.

One of these clever lawmakers must have discovered the Oxford dictionary to come up with that! Now I believe that this lovely piece of brilliantly thought out economically sustainable model is maybe going to the dogs. As if they want it. I believe it is going to cost more to get the fines out via registered post than they are going to make out of it. Now that by itself must send alarm bells. How much does it cost to send a letter out via registered post?

More than a R300.00 rand fine? But once again, it is structured so that we have two or three beneficial NEE (BBBEE) companies doing this. I wonder how many millions was spend on something that is not going to work.

One of the other brilliant things in AARTO is a points demerit system for repeat traffic offenders. No point = no licence.

This is brilliant! It means that after about three months all Taxi's should be of our streets!

Yeah fucking right! You can't enforce those laws! You can't even keep the people that work for you under check.

That is another brilliant example to lead SA. At one hospital premature babies was left for 10 hours! No food, soiled nappies! Fuck! They must be barbarians. NO! They fucking are!

And so boys and girls I can go on and on about how to Lead SA. Be positive with your eyes closed! Go on! One day it might go much worse and then you are all going to wonder what happened!

And please, do not call me negative!

You made that bed

2010-08-20T07:42:00.000+02:00

now to sleep in it.

We will make this country ungovernable. This was something that the current government used to say in the old apartheid regime.    They accomplished this with violence, protests and strikes.

Now those same master are in control.   But they have forgot to tell their loyal subjects that.   As the public sector strikes they do go back to the born in behaviour of intimidation and destruction. On the news this morning the ANC are warning them to behave.   WARNING?

Fuck it is to early in the morning for jokes.   What are you going to do? Fire them?

No you can't do nothing. You made the liberal labour laws. Live with it.

I am also very unhappy about the demographics in the public service sector.   Looking at all the images on the news sites I do not see much white and indian faces.

Oh sorry I forgot. Those two sectors of the population is still working trying to keep everything afloat.

What the.......

2010-08-16T20:44:00.000+02:00

On a local radio station they have this insert. WHAT THE...........

So the the missus lost her purse last weekend.   How she managed that is a story for another long post.....

But one of the things she lost is her gun licence for her little pea shooter.   So of to the cops she go and while she completes a form, she asks them if they can check when we are going to get our new licences to comply with the draconian gun laws in this country or should I say cuntree.   Anyhow, we applied for them about 2 and a half years ago. Do remember they expire after 5.

The cop answer! If you are lucky you might get them by end 2011.

WHAT THE FUCK!

They expire again 2012???? and then I had them for a year?

They are so fucking stupid.....same with the new AARTO that should have been implemented with the demerit system for road offences.   That is now canned indefinitely....

WHAT THE........

PS. A pea shooter or no gun?   I will take the pea shooter....

Ag fucking please......

2010-08-13T07:43:00.000+02:00

A recent count showed theANC had more than 820 000 members -- and many of them Afrikaners

Ag please, why in your right mind will join a party that is against the colour of your skin? Also when asked please give us some numbers to this fact ....Eish I will get those for you......

They should look at the Western Cape........Shining example of Afrikaners in the ANC.

They can spew shit around every corner. Maybe when we have the media tribunal they will also stop shit like this.

Fucking idiots....

So after the drama

2010-08-06T09:44:00.000+02:00

I have joined the Roodekrans neighbourhood watch as an active patrolling member. I have also started to get the whole street involved. This is going to be he only way that we are going to stop this crap. So far I have out of 54 houses a possible 40, that are keen to join the watch.

The only way that we are going to stop it is to be vigilant. Hopefully we will be lucky to actually catch one or two of these bastards.

I have an old style sjambok in the garage that have not tasted blood in quite a while.

The horror waiting to happen....

2010-08-05T06:53:00.000+02:00

It is Tuesday evening, I am sitting at home in front of the television and as I watch I hear two shots ring out.

I make a remark to HQ that it was definite gun shots. 8 minutes later the cops light up my yard with the search light on their chopper!

What the fuck! Race down to the bedroom , get the gun and wait. The search light leaves my yard and continues up the road. Then I get the SMS from the neighbourhood watch. Shooting at this address.

Again what the fuck. Beginning to sound like fucking Gordon Ramsey. So out I go to be met with a street full of cops, neighbourhood watch and not one fucking bad guy in sight.

What transpired two houses away from me....

Well read it yourself

Luckily Phillip will survive....

Fucking bastards!!!

Uhm....told you so.....

2010-08-04T13:31:00.000+02:00

What is the difference between ZANUPF and the ANC. Clearly nothing. It seems that good old Bob's way of handling your media has filtered down south.

This must be the biggest threat that this country is now facing. We will do as we please and you print the spin, or else! This has a ring to it like te old Apartheid days. We will make sure the information that you need is authorised by us.

And as the thievery has now become so main stream, this must surely be the best thing they can do for themselves.

I do hope that something drastic happens. I still maintain that the tax paying citizen must wake up. The tax payer must question this with the threat of withholding taxes.

But then again we are talking about the white people in SA. How many of you have invited your neighbours over for supper?

Most likely none.....

I like the static.....

2010-08-03T20:28:00.000+02:00

Layout of my blog. Unfortunately it has been spoiled now with this post.

But hey, I have to put something on here every now and again. I see that I am being missed by Rum deprived people.

Oh well.....

The N1 Toll road

2010-07-02T08:51:00.000+02:00

So I have a pet gripe with a road that is 40 years old, it has been upgraded and now it is a toll road. I have left a couple of snotty remarks on facebook about this. So I send the Democratic alliance an e-mail.

My mail

Please can you assist in whether the DA has challenged the proposed tolling of the N1 highway?

I live in the West rand and is employed in Sandton – Middle class income earner married with two kids

There is no alternative transport like the fantastic Gautrain or bus services directly to Sandton. I also work 9 to 5 UK hours that offers me the opportunity to miss peak hour traffic and as a result do not crawl through Randburg on the now pebble roads (due to the terrible state of these roads) but can get to the office in 30 minutes using the now renewed N1 highway.

I have no issue with return on capital and support tolling as a rule as maintenance of our roads is of upmost importance. Return on capital within a year I do have a serious issue with as tolling the N1 highway will by the sound of it will pay for itself in 1 year? The financial industry norm these days makes for a 5 year return on capital and in employing this return the tolling should be reduced to 10 cents per kilometer instead of the proposed 50 cents allowing me to still be able to afford the luxury of using of a proper road in South Africa with the absence of public transport.

Surely I and other individuals have a constitutional right to use our national highways in the absence of save public transport – as per above I would most certainly use the Gautrain but as an Afrikaans speaking individual cannot find/afford education and security in the East Rand with the same quality I now enjoy.

And the political reply:

Your inquiry has been forwarded to me by Angus Mackenzie for additional information.

The DA is not opposed to the tolling of roads. We are however opposed to taxing the same service repeatedly. It seems that you too agree with this philosophy if I read your e-mail correctly.

We, the DA, have thus made it abundantly clear to the ANC in Gauteng during the recent budget debate in the Legislature that we are opposed to the multiple layers of taxation that are being applied to our upgraded roads namely toll, fuel levy, provincial motor vehicle taxes and income tax. They chose not to respond to that point in the debate.

The DA is concerned that the motorist is being used as a cash-cow every time the fiscus requires a cash injection and yet our roads continue to deteriorate in general.

We are aware that the Transport and Roads Minister announced that at least 92 billion Rand is required for upgrading our roads, Our own calculations reveal that in excess of R120 billion is needed. We have long been calling for a dedicated Road Fund and it seems that the Minister is starting to listen.

There is a lomg list of things that must occur before the tolls can be levied although the process through the Legislature can be pretty rapid as the tolling of Roads is already established under SA Law and this would merely be Provincial subordinate legislation.

Firstly the roads must be fully upgraded. Secondly the automatic toll reader housings must be constructed and the toll readers installed. Thirdly the Intelligent Numberplate System (INS) must be introduced.

In all these matters except the upgrading of roads the Department is behind schedule. INS is due for initiation in October but several critical parts of the system are not yet in place. Without the INS the tolling is impossible although the Department says it will kick in in April 2011. Another problem is that the proposed INS legislation only requires the phasing in of INS over the next 3 years starting with new cars and very old number plates so how they intend to toll everybody when not all cars are required to have INS remains a mystery although we have asked the question. The ANC did/could not respond.

We in the Gauteng Roads and Transport Portfolio Committee have not debated the quanta of tolls at all and the tolling itself was given to the committee as fait accompli by the ANC.

I therefore think that your calculations on capital redemption if you would share your work or the source of your figures with me, would empower me in the committee to call for lower tolls.

Your figures will assist when the debate at committee level occurs as the figures we all see are media based and (I hope) leaked or insinuated by the ANC to the media so that when a lower rate is announced resistance will be lower,

The DA fully understands the strain the proposed tolls will place on many road users and the inflationary effect the tolls will have on everything.

If I have not clarified anything please let me know.

Kind regards

Neil Campbell

(Dr) DA Spokesperson on Roads and Transport in Gauteng.

In other words, the ANC is going to take our money.......

Now that the world cup is in full swing.....

2010-06-18T07:08:00.000+02:00

I would like to congratulate the authorities. No Fuck really.

I see that the striking security guards have all been fired and are being replaced by the police service. Very well fucking done. But why can't you do this to all fucking striking workers and tell the unions to fuck off! Oh no wait the world is watching.....

I must also congratulate you on the crime prevention that is taking place, very well fucking done. I could not believe that you have first of all actually had resources in Magaliesburg to find three thieves that held foreign journalist at gun point. And then they where found, apprehended sent to court and I believe already sentenced! Well done!

Now, what once again takes the piss out of me! Why the fuck can't you provide this service to your fucking citizens. If we are being murdered the suspects are not found, never mind fucking arrested!

And I can recall a couple of cases from close friends that never had any resolution!

Why now all this great efficiency!

Oh I forgot, the world is watching..........

Now can this be classified under my tax paying suckers(Yes Wreckless I am a sucker to) Yes most definitely! Cause this is the type of service that is 15 years overdue!

I am getting depressed.....

2010-06-17T10:08:00.000+02:00

I have decided that this country is making me depressed. I have had enough of the turd world mentalities.

So me and the misses have decided that we might start to look at emigrating. And no, I do not know where we want to go. It is up for discussion.

And al always you know that the grass is greener cause of the shit.

But we will see.

tax paying suckers

2010-06-15T19:41:00.000+02:00

and so the first of my new articles, that is if I can keep it up or or feel like posting....

They will be called the tax paying suckers.

Jackie selebi is costing the tax payer 14.5 million in legal fees

Eskom has factored in Performance bonusses for the Cadres that work at a non functional parastatal 9.5 million....

and hosting the world cup has been overshot with 34 billion.......(estimates) They do not want to release the document. It will most probably be worse than the arms deal.

SUCKERS!!!!!

I am un-patriotic

2010-06-11T07:44:00.000+02:00

and that is out of my own fucking choice. I do not give a fuck about all the great soccer teams that have arrived in South Africa. Nor do I give a fuck about the results of this sport.

I do not want to know how do do the Diski dance or blow the vuvuzela. I do not want to buy any fucking thing that resembles a fucking flag for my car.

I will not wear any soccer shirts on Soccer Fridays.

so.......

Fuck-off!!!

And the next person who sticks a Vuvuzela in my face and blow it........

Tswane! Tswane! TSWANE!!!!

2010-04-21T07:06:00.000+02:00

Well so when is Pretoria going to be called Tswane?

I am all in favour of this change and I think it has been overdue for quite some time. I do embrace these sort of changes in our country. It is for the better that this must be done.

Let me explain...

Pretoria is also called the Jacaranda city due to all the Jacaranda trees planted in the streets. Every October a display of purple flower envelope the city. And yes it does look pretty awesome.

I remember that we used to walk through the place at night many years ago, going from club to club.

But this morning when I drove into the CBD it looked liked Tswane, NOT Pretoria, but Tswane.
A Tswane where all the rubbish is dumped in the streets by the very people who should keep clean. A city of which its employees do not have any fucking pride, none.

To them it is al about Demands, we demand this, we demand that. And if our demands are not met, then we will turn this place into Tswane!

Oh fuck off!!!!!

2010-04-20T12:54:00.000+02:00

Got this mail!

RE: Multiple Fines Outstanding

1. We want to record that you have 3 outstanding fines with a total value outstanding R500 .

2. We record further that various Notices in terms of Section 341 of the Criminal Procedures Act Number 51 of 1977 as amended were posted to you.

3. In terms of the aforementioned Notices, the period within which payment in admission of guilt may be made has lapsed.

4. You may still admit your guilt to the offences in question by making a payment before 2010/04/06. Failure to do so may result in criminal proceedings being instituted against you in terms of the Road Traffic Act 93 of 1996 and Section 54 of the Criminal Procedure Act 51 of 1977.

5. Payment in admission of guilt of the offences in terms of the Criminal Procedures Act 51 of 1977 can be made into the banking account below:

Account Name: City Of Johannesburg
Bank: ABSA Bank
Branch Code: 637956
Account Number: 4054398332
Reference Number: PLEASE NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY EACH FINE INDIVIDUALLY
As a point of reference, please quote this number when phoning in: F3/37518/172/075361 or your IDNumber.

6. You may also using the following website to view and pay on www.payfine.co.za or contact the JMPD call centre on 0878054906 for further details and the reference numbers for your individual fines.

7. Furthermore you may also pay at any payment office of the issuing Authority being the City Of Johannesburg

8. To verify the autheniticity of this email, please feel free to contact the JMPD Call Centre or go through to any JMPD office with a printout of this email.

Should you have any queries regarding the above we urge you to call our call centre on 0878054906 between 08H00 and 21H00 Monday to Friday, 08H00 and 16H00 Saturday.

Yours faithfully,
JMPD

What is so fucking nice is that point 3...you are screwed, but .4 like an infomercial if you pay now!! Ah fuckoff!!!

What the FUCK!

2010-04-15T10:09:00.000+02:00

What a lovely message do we we get from ET's murder.

If you are a under age poor black kid, go and murder a white farmer. You will get to sleep in a bed, get three meals a day, go to school and get to watch some TV at night.

....

Africa 's Cleverest

2010-04-08T11:55:00.000+02:00

An airplane was about to crash; there were 5 passengers on board but only 4 parachutes.

The first passenger said, 'I'm Christiano Rinaldo, the world's number 1 footballer FIFA needs me, I can't afford to die.' So he took the first pack and Left the plane.

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, said, 'I am the wife of the Former President of the United States , I am the most ambitious woman in The world. I am also New York Senator and a potential future President. She just took the 2nd parachute and jumped out of the plane.

The third passenger, Julius Malema, said, 'I'm also a President. Millions of South African youth always look to me for guidance. Above all I'm the cleverest youth President in African history, and Africa 's people Won't let me die'. Futhermore I have millions that I have not spent yet.So he put on a pack next to him and jumped out of the plane.

The fourth passenger, Nelson Mandela, says to the fifth passenger, a 10yr old Chinese school boy, 'I'm old and have lived a fruitful life, God will decide my fate, so I'll let you have the last parachute'. The boy said, 'It's OK, there's a parachute left for you. Africa 's Cleverest has taken my schoolbag'.

Dankie Andre!

2010-04-08T11:00:00.000+02:00

Dankie Andre Visagie!

Now this man is second in command of the AWB. Last night they show this clip with him being interviewed on some E-tv political shit show.

Now he just behaved as the fucked up AWB normally does. Instead of waiting for a calculated way in telling the black bitch in front of him that she does not have any fucking manners, he lost his temper moered the Microphone over the studio and caused kak!

How much nicer would it have been for him to just wait till she stopped her ranting....and then told her cool and calmly that I only debate issues with people that have manners and you don't!

Tata Goodbye and Fuckoff!

Zim 'a shining example of BEE'

2010-04-08T10:55:00.000+02:00

Now how fucking stupid can you be! This is the sort of article that makes my day!

They try to depict themselves as the most ingenious poeple (Spelling) that has ever roamed the land! No other race is can achieve what they did!

Well sorry ne! If you are that clever and productive why would you have to rely on BEE!!!!

You only shout racism cause it is an easy excuse to hide your incompetence!

Two more months......

2010-03-31T10:32:00.000+02:00

Then it is fishing time again.

We had a wonderful time at the coast on my yearly trip down to Ballito. We stayed in a different house this year. The one we normally rent was unfortunately occupied. The new house was right on the beach. Bargain!!!!!

We spend all the days going to the beach, come back for a brunch and a couple of beers and then back to the beach for the late afternoon, supper and a couple of Captains.

I do not do much fishing, just one afternoon stuffing around with the small rod. But in two months time then it will be the fishing trip! No children and wife to entertain! All fishing time!

Can't wait!!!!!

2010-03-12T10:57:00.000+02:00

one....Two.......THREE!!!!!!!

2010-03-09T12:23:00.000+02:00

More working days left and then I am of to go and do a bit of fresh water fishing! and then after that also three more working days then it is time for some rock and surf drinking.

Well I can't wait!

Happy birthday dear............!!!!

2010-03-01T21:07:00.001+02:00

Bog Happy birthday to you......

Well not fucking yet but on the 20th this blog will be three years old. Quite a nice blast to go back to previous post and then try and comprehend how I got it right to come up with some of that shit.

and this post was brought to you by my favorite sponsor.......Fucking Boredom!

think of something.......Anything!!!!

2010-03-01T14:51:00.000+02:00

Well three weeks ago I started to run a bit every morning. I run 5kms three times a week.

Last week on my Wednesday morning run, halfway around the block I started to cough and it just did not want to stop. I started walking back home barking worse than the neigborwood fucking muts.

After about ten minutes the coughing subsided and I decided that I must stop the nasty shit habit of smoking. So Thursday morning on my way to work I had one smoke left, and well i smoked it.

Since then I have not touched one. It was a gruelling weekend, but I came of it not to bad. So far so good! I even had a couple of captain morgans Saturday night....

So wish me luck

發燙 said...

2010-02-09T11:03:00.000+02:00

Now for 發燙 I have repoted this blog as a spam generator, Lets see if they close him down

New Element Discovered in South Africa to Be Included on the Periodic Table:

2010-02-09T08:05:00.000+02:00

The Nuclear Physics Department of the University of Stellenbosch has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 - 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each re-organization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

My Spam is better than DMDad's!!!!!

2010-02-08T14:28:00.000+02:00

Money just rolling in!!!!

My associate has helped me to send your first payment of US$7,500 to you
as instructed by Mr.James Gordon Brown the British prime minister after
the last G20 meeting that was held on April 2nd in London, making you one
of the beneficaries. Here is the information below:

MONEY TRANSFER CONTROL NUMBER:8024087629
SENDER NAME:SOLOMON
Last name:DANEIL
Address:London,Uk
AMOUNT: US$7,500

I told him to keep sending you US$7,500 twice a week until the FULL
payment of (US $360,000.00 Dollars) is completed within 6 (six) Months.For
track, send your

Full Names via Email to:

Mr Garry Moore
E-mail:western_uniontransfer15@iwrahost.com
Tel:+447024044997

More money!!!!!

FUND FINAL PAYMENT BOARD/PAYMENT SETTLEMENT VALUE AMOUNT: $850,000.00USD:

We Apologize for the delay of your payment and all the Inconveniences and
hiccups that we might have caused you. However, we were having some minor
problem with our payment systems, which is Inexplicable, and have held us
stranded and Indolent, not having the Prerequisite to
devote our 100% endowment in accrediting foreign payments.

We apologized once again, for the delay. From the Record of outstanding
Debts due for payment to you for { AWARD LOTTERY FUND CLAIMS AND
INHERITANCE CLAIM}

THIS OFFICE: FUND PAYMENT COMMITTEE IN CONJUNCTION WITH OVERSEAS CREDIT
COMMISSION has been mandated to Make pay all outstanding debts

your name and Particulars were discovered as next on the list due for
outstanding
payment.

We wish to inform you now that the square peg is now in square hole and
can be accelerated so that your payment can be processed and will be
released to you as soon as you respond to this letter. Also note that from
therecord in our file, YOUR APPROVED PAYMENT IS US$850,000.00Usd
(EIGHT HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS).

You are advised to choose any preferred method of which you will like to
receive the payment with

{1} Certified Bank Draft Mail to your home address.
{2} Wire Transfer to your nominated bank account of your choice within
48hours

Soon as you get in touched with Mr. James White Overseas Credit Commission.
E-mail:james_white44@hotmail.com
In the light of this mentioned.

You are required to furnish this office with the following information, as
this will enable us to process and release your cash prize without any
further
delay.

NOTE THAT THESE DETAILS ARE VERY IMPORTANT FOR YOUR PAYMENT

Your Full Name:
Your valid Telephone and fax Numbers:
Present occupation:
Date of birth:
Your account info for wire transfer into your account:
Residential Address:

Forward your urgent reply/payment information's to

Mr. James White
Via this e-mail:james_white02@w.cn,
for speedy release of your long
Over-due payment

Mrs. Rosemary Russell.
VICE PRESIDENT
FINAL PAYMENT SETTLEMENT
@2009

Damn, he knows the upcoming lottery numbers!!!!!!!!

Goodday Sir/Madam, My name is Mr Calvin Westlin, I work in the Euro Lottery. I am soliciting your assistance for a swift transfer of 4,528,000 GBP, should you be willing to assist me in this project, you will be giving me just 25% of your winnings. Just as a brief, due to my position in the company I can make it happen that you would be a winner of the above stated amount. Naturally, every body would like to play a lottery if they are assured of winning. I am assuring you today to be a winner, please do not take for granted this once in a life time opportunity as we both stand to collectively gain from this at the success of the transaction. Should you be willing to assist me in this transaction please do respond to my secure e-mail : calvinwestlin@iwrahost.com Regards, Mr Calvin Westlin

I am way ahead of DMDad when it comes to retirement!!!!

"When do the whiteys have to start worrying?"

2010-02-04T13:11:00.000+02:00

This Question was posted on the following link.

What people always fail to remember is that the Afrikaner (Boer) nation was born out of oppression. (Quick Take on History)

When the Dutch landed in SA and started their post a lot of other nations also had influence in this country like the French. Out of them the Afrikaner was born which was a farming community in then Dutch colony.

As time went by the Dutch started to impose themselves on this Farming community and as a result we came to the Groot Trek (Great trek) Where these brave souls loaded their ox wagens and trekked up North into Dark Africa.

As they went they no obviously started to meet the natives which as we know where not killed at sight. They (Piet Retief) went to the Zulu king and negotioted for land and was ultimately massacred by the Zulus.

Then gold was discovered and the English started their on slaught. They even went so far as to murder our woman and children in concentration camps. Only in 1910 a Union was declared. Independence on a win for the white minority only came in 1948 to 1994 when we where betrayed by the likes of FW de klerk.

No that is just shy of 50 years of power which started in a depression like the world has never seen (WW2) In those years we tried to build a first world bubble in deep africa, Which succeeded. Great hospitals, infrastucture, defence force etc.

Now as we know, that bubble got pricked in 1994 and hence all the great hospitals, roads and rail is at a point of collapse.

And the white people (Which is no longer the Afrikaner by himself but a mix of white races) that is being oppressed by a goverment who's only ideology is to enrich themselves and their closest connected partners.

Now what do we need to do, wait for horrible things to happen to the white nation? Sorry but it is not going to happen, it has already started with farm murders and the so called BEE BBBEEE structures.

Which by the way is the reason that old clever Julius is calling for nationalisation of the mines.
It is to save all those BEE deals in the background that is turning sour.

Who is going to stop us! Lets say they deploy the army to oppress us. No chance, they could net even get Lesotho under control a couple of years ago. That is why we have the new gun laws. They are shit scared to have an armed population. Just see what happened when Bok van Blerk released the song De la Rey.

The goverment was in uproar that the white nations is going to take up arms as we where fueled by this song!

I am sorry but life is yet still to comfortable for us. But when it does turn sour I believe that we shall stand united.

Life and times of......

2010-02-04T12:48:00.000+02:00

Me.

Damn I need to go and fish! My family life is negatively impacting on my favorite hobby. Not to go to my other passion which is woodworking. Must actually start the tools up to see if they still work. Might be surprised to find that some of them departed to the great toolshed in the sky.

I also need to have a couple of drinks with people that I have not seen in a while. Our work commitments makes us quite unsociable. No wonder Facebook has become this faceless monster. I even have to send meeting invites to invite my friends so that they have it in the calenders when we want to have a braai(BBQ). WTF!!!

What happened to a simple call and of we go! It is not like their is a shortage of fucking phones.

I even have friends that I can't remember nor know, they should have some categories on Facebook friends. Maybe like Friends, some other peoples Friends, school idiots, my friends, friends, friends,... And a Who the Fuck are you group.

It would be interesting to see where people place you in their friend profiles.

I really need to go fish....

Otherwise I can think of more useless shit to post while I am supposed to work.

What do you know.....

2010-01-26T13:01:00.000+02:00

I have a busy schedule to get through in the next couple of months and it is only going to be fun.

Next month, another camping trip at the Narrows in Kaapsehoop. A lovely private camp in the middle of a couple of trees next to stream and surrounded by nature. And the odd empty bottle of Captains floating around in camp.

Then March we are of to a dam with another fishing trip with the children. End of March of to Balito with the family.

Beginning June it is us and the Transkei for the yearly Kosi fishing team trip. We should one day go back to Kosi before the name changes to the Transkei group.

Now the only thing that spoils all of this is the work in-between, Think I must play the Powerball lotto. That can get rid of this nasty habit.

BLAH, Blah, Blah, Eeeeh, Eeeeh!!!

2010-01-25T20:01:00.000+02:00

And that my fellow reader is the negative state of mind that I am in again in again in again .....

TGIF!

2010-01-22T11:57:00.000+02:00

This week was hard.

One of these bright and rainy days I am going to go to the JRA (Johannesburg road agency) Another department who only exists on paper and draw a salary.

It is not like you see any improvements or maintenance. But I am still going to go to their offices and shove a tube of Silicon up the ass of the person responsible for maintaining robots (Traffic lights). Then I am going to ask him to go to the toilet and take a shit!

Hopefully he will come back with a negative on the shit experience.

Eish,,,,,my ass is sealed by the silicone!!!

Exactly use some of it on the fucking traffic lights so that they work when it is raining!

The week that was

2010-01-21T08:56:00.000+02:00

Last week I did some more repairs to my old hilux. It was time for new brake shoes and disks. For a change the thing now stops in a straight line when the brakes are applied. The job kept me busy for nearly 6 hours.

Sunday we took the children to the valley of the waves and had very tiring day. I think I went down the tubes close to a hundred times with the children. It felt more than a thousand when I woke up on Monday morning.

I believe there might be something wrong with the comments on this page, if so then I can't help as it must be either your machine or google who is screwing around.

A Lesson Learned!

2010-01-14T13:48:00.000+02:00

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman:" Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."

Doctor:"I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle".

2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.

Woman:" Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with chamomile tea and he never touched me.

Doctor:" you see how keeping your mouth shut helps!!!"

One day.......

2010-01-07T07:43:00.000+02:00

I am going to shoot my best friend!

Yesterday when I arrive at home I discover that Diezel is missing once again. He went for a walk by himself a couple of months ago. And as then I followed the same drill.

Go to all the nearby vets, call the SPCA and drive around the neighbourhood to see if I can maybe spot him. After two hours worth of slowly cruising the streets, NOTHING!

I go back home and watch a bit of cricket when my other dog starts to bark and head outside.

On the other side of the gate! Crap piece of shit Boerboel! Once again I am so happy I forget to kick his ass!

Well What do you know.....

2010-01-05T13:01:00.000+02:00

Seems I am going to move bank accounts. FNB is showing its true colours to the wonderful rainbow nation. (Which does not have white in it!)

It was reacting to the November edition of FNB's employees newsletter TreeTalk, in which the bank offered the support to African, Indian, Coloured and Chinese employees earning less than R100 000 a year.

"White employees who struggle and earn less than R100 000 are simply excluded, purely on the basis of their race," union spokesperson Dirk Hermann said in a statement.

Worst is that as I know my fellow white south Africans is that they will still support this bunch

Well it is 2010....

2010-01-05T12:14:00.000+02:00

And it is another year of the same old shit.

I have been neglecting this blog over the last couple of months as my one reader and two followers will know.

We had a wonderful festive season with the mandatory eating and drinking that goes with it. On the home front not much happened. Sleep, wake up go to work, get back home and well sleep again......

I have a couple of projects planned for this year but they are time depended, as they where last year. Hopefully I will have a bit more time seeing that my little boy is getting older and can be left alone for about 5 minutes at a time without getting himself into to much trouble and does he manage to cause crap!

That is it, and I will try to beat DMDad at the amount of posts before I am called a "Lurker"

My oldest friend (and best) is on the verge......

2009-11-19T12:55:00.000+02:00

of having his life changed for ever.

Him and the missus is on their way in receiving the best gift one can ever get!

If all goes well he will be dad by the end of today. Good luck boet and enjoy your new girl!

Sleepless nights, being puked on, changing nappies, don't have an idea what to do! The joys of having children.

To Quote...

2009-11-19T07:00:00.000+02:00

"It's all crap, think about it, none of it matters anyway - it's just all crap!"

Trip down to Mosselbay

2009-10-26T11:17:00.000+02:00

Two weeks ago we went to vist great granny who stays in Grootbrak. For those of you who are not familiar with the area, it is in the Western cape close to Mosselbay.

We flew down and I had to contend two hours with my little boy sitting on my lap. He was not phased at all about flying. The only thing that mattered to him was how to get the tray table clip undone. Luckily he studied the safety information so I would not have any issues with him in case of an emergencyWe arrived at George airport, got a nissan Tilda hire and went to drop all our luggage at the guest house in Tergniet. It is a wonderful situated house with a lovely view over the ocean.
Every morning we could see whales just of shore

One of our biggest past times during the day was to go and swim in the heated pool in Hartenbos.

Tuesday we dedicated to take a drive to Oudtshoorn as the wind picked up everyday taking away any chance of lying on the beach. We did the tourist thing and visited an ostrich farm and the Kango wildlife sanctuary.

Stood on some ostrich eggs,

And even took a ride on one

We did go to the beach when the weather gave us a chance. But with the fairest Cape that is not always a possibility.

Hear is dropshot going down a dune.

Most of the days was spend going for a early walk on the beach and a swim in the afternoon. It was a relaxing week. Great granny is still strong but age is starting to take it toll. Walking up and down stairs is only achieved with great effort, she is only a mere 83 years old.

She enjoyed her great grandchildren for the week and spoiled them with stuff to munch everytime they walked into her house.

Hopefully if all goes well we will do so again next year.

The Financial Crisis....The Solution...

2009-09-28T12:40:00.000+02:00

It is August. In a small town on the South Coast of France the holiday season is in full swing, but it is raining so there is not too much business happening.

Everyone is heavily in debt.

Luckily, a rich Lithuanian tourist arrives in the foyer of the small local hotel. He asks for a room and puts a €100 note on the reception counter, takes a key and goes to inspect the room located up the stairs on the third floor.

The hotel owner takes the banknote in a hurry and rushes to his meat supplier to whom he owes €100.

The butcher takes the money and races to his supplier to pay his debt.

The wholesaler rushes to the farmer to pay €100 for pigs he purchased some time ago.

The farmer triumphantly gives the €100 note to a local prostitute who gave him her services on credit.

The prostitute goes quickly to the hotel, as she was owing the hotel for her hourly room use to entertain clients..

At that moment, the rich Lithuanian is coming down to reception. He informs the hotel owner that the proposed room is unsatisfactory. He takes back his €100 and departs.

There was no profit or income. But everyone no longer has any debt and the small townspeople look optimistically towards their future.

Winston the Pigeon

2009-09-22T13:23:00.000+02:00

As some of you might know, a company in Durban strapped a 4 gig card onto a Homer pigeon named Winston.

Open the office window and with Winston in the right hand clicked the mouse with the left hand , throw Winston out of the windows and see who wins.

The lazy overpriced voice and data supplier, better know as Telkom or Winston. Well I believe Winston came through flying.....

4 gig delivered and Telkom was something at 30% transmitted.

And Now the Solution from Telkom we all have been waiting for

Upcoming 2010 world cup

2009-09-18T10:56:00.000+02:00

It has come to my attention that most of the people that will visit SA will not be able to understand the local population hence some tips on how to get along

A VITAL GUIDE TO SABC TV PRONUNCIATION
Put together to help foreigners understand African English.

Auw – Sorry, I didn’t know.
Beck - not the front
Beds - doves, vultures, etc.
Ben - to set alight
Begga – you buy at Mc Donnalds
Cheeps- Comes with the burger.
Cut - a small vehicle drawn by a donkey
Ebbon Erras - districts, (Urban areas)
Eh – Yes or no.
Eish- I buggered up something / I’ve got no idea.
Farra – Your dad
Feather - implies distance - Cape Town is feather than Johannesburg
Vok - pronged cutlery, often used with a knife.
Forranna – Someone from another country.
Gavamint – The people that tries to rule the country.
Guddin - around your house, where you grow plunts.
Get- A hinged opening in a fence
Hair - as opposed to him/ hiss.
Itch "itch and aviary pairsin"
Kennel - Army officer.
Len - to acquire knowledge
Marra - The Woman that is married to your Farra
Marram - Woman
Mills - Food on a plate
Pairsin- Human being
Pee-Pull – Human beings
Poh Pee-Pull - Financially challenged people
Phlegm - the hot part at the end of a candle
piepie – End of war, symbolised by white doves.
Straaik – There is one every week for people to lazy to work.
Suffa-Ring - as in "the pee-pull are suffa-ring"
Parrot Teksi - not a mamba of the teksi assoseshen (illegal taxi)
Soaka - Football, often played between Kaisa-Chiifs and Pie-rats.
Teksi - Mini Bus capable of carrying more people than a bus.
Toks - Negotiations
Weana - the winner takes all
Wekkas – they are supposed to do da wek (work)
Weld - The Earth
Wok - what you must learn to do before you can run.

As this is not enough it is crucial for the visitors to be able to recognize the work titles of the population

NEW JOB TITLES IN AFRICA in preparation for 2010!!!

Murderer : Population Stabilizer

Orphan : Independent Youngster

Beggar : Financial Gatherer

Cleaner : Hygiene Specialist

Gardener : Landscape Executive

House Maid : Family Environs Upkeep Manager

Receptionist :Front Office Manager/Office Access Control Specialist

Messenger : Business Communications Conveyer

Window Cleaner : Transparent Wall Technician

Temporary Teacher :Associate Tutor

Tea lady : Refreshment Overseer

Garbage Collector : Public Sanitation Technician

Watchman/security : Theft Prevention and Surveillance Officer or

Wealth Distribution Prevention Officer

Prostitute : Practical Sexual Relations Officer

Thief : Wealth Distribution Officer

Driver : Automobile Propulsion Specialist

Maid : Domestic Operations Specialist

Employee without Portfolio : Administration Manager

Cook : Food Preparation Officer

Unemployed :Township Management

Gossiping :Research Management

And then we must make them aware of the local Copy of Microsoft windows if they want to send that all important e-mail back home

The New South African edition may be recognised by looking at the opening screen. It reads "E-WEENDOWS 99" with a background picture of a Mageu bottle superimposed on a Orlando Pirates flag. It is shipped with a choice of a Black Label or a Toyota Hi-Ace screen saver.

New Features :
The buttons and icons are renamed as follows :-
OK - Sharp!
Cancel - Aikona
Undo- Hauk! meesteck!
Redo- Haikona, not meesteck!
Save- Ekke ek bere hom
Find - Ekke ek soek hom
Help - A'ishh/a'ngaazi
Run - Hamba
Personal folder - e-My theengs
Shut Down- Chaila
Caps Lock - e-Beeg letas
Escape - Bribe e-jaila
Home - e-Kaya mina
End - e-Feeneesh
Delete - e-Wipe-out

Some programs that are exclusive to "E Weendows 99"
e-MS Wed - a word processor
e-Celculata - calculator
e-Scretch peppa- notepad
e-Jive Box- CD player
e-Explora - Microsoft Internet Explorer
e-Pikcha - a graphics viewer
e-Stockvel- M/S accounting software

Also note :
The Recycle Bin is labelled e-Mampara
Control Panel is known as Don' taach dees buttens!

Then if this is not confusing the crap out of them they must be aware of what the SA government structure is.

Doctor Fishman.....

2009-09-17T21:22:00.000+02:00

Hopefully Max will feel a bit better after DR Fishman have prescribed a couple of Millers to try and to attend to his current depressed pissed off state of mind.

The only thing that might be of concern is that I could not get my patient to drink the prescribed amount of said Millers.

He only had about three and I could have sworn the prescription said a minimum of Six. He babbled something about a conference call. But next time maybe I will fair better.

Thanks boet enjoyed the drinks....

Daddy longlegs

2009-09-16T13:46:00.000+02:00

A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden..
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.
He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention.

He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating..
'Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?' she asked.
'They're mating,' her father replied.
'What do you call the spider on top?' she asked.
'That's a Daddy Longlegs,' her father answered.
'So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?' the little girl asked.
'No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.'

'The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then
lifted her foot and stomped them flat.

'Well, we're not having any of that gay kak in OUR garden' she said.

I would like to present

2009-09-15T12:36:00.000+02:00

MRS Balls.....!

old one... but great!

2009-09-15T11:49:00.000+02:00

Two boys are playing cricket on a field in Durban , when one is attacked
by a vicious Rottweiler.

Thinking quickly, the other boy took his cricket bat and managed to wedge
it down the dog's collar and twist, luckily breaking the dog's neck and
stopping its attack.
A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to
interview the boy.
"Young Sharks Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in
his notebook.

"But I'm not a Sharks fan," the little hero replied.
"Sorry, since we are in Durban , I just assumed you were," said the
reporter and starts again.
"Stormers Fan Rescues Friend from Horrific Attack,..." he continued
writing in his notebook.
"I'm not a Stormers fan either!", the boy said."
"I assumed everyone in Durban was either for the Sharks or Stormers. So
what team DO you root for?" the reporter asked.

"I'm a Blue Bulls fan", the child beamed.
The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes:
"Little F*cker from Pretoria Kills Beloved Family Pet."

Moving into summer

2009-09-15T07:39:00.000+02:00

I have taken the following pics from 21st May to today in Pretoria.

Amazing how the sun migrated south on the horizon as we go into summer.

21st May 2009 @ 6:50, sun rising to the left of the Union Buildings

31st August 2009 @ 6:33, sun rising to the right of the Union Buildings

And Today @ 6:22 AM, Where is the Union Buildings?

.

Pet diaries..

2009-09-14T12:29:00.000+02:00

Excerpt from a Dog's Diary........

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpt from a Cat's Diary...

Day 983 of my captivity....

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now .

Fishing shoes

2009-09-14T10:07:00.000+02:00

We always look for shoes that can give excellent grip on the rocks next to the coast. The dangers of slipping with kak shoes are always prevailant and can ruin your trip, tackle and maybe even yourself.

Now the best shoes to wear with regards to traction and antislip features is the old trusted Dairy Gumboot. These things where made not to slip in wet conditions. They do work extremely well in that regard while fishing.

The draw back with the gumboot is that your feet does not breathe. Hence they feel like they are in a oven and after three days fishing, well they develop a slight smell.

A very nice comfortable thing to wear but not attractive at all is Crocs. They are light and some form of antibacterial thing in the plastic stops them from smelling. But they do not handle slippery rocks while trying to cast an 8 ounce sinker 200 meters away.

So this got me thinking lets combine the two.

They do not look that great, but I think they are now more comfortable than the original, though a bit heavier.

Now to get time to go and test them!

This morning on my way

2009-09-14T07:06:00.000+02:00

to work I received shocking news. I nearly rolled my car.

Julius Malema won't be at the airport today to welcome the rugby team back home. He has some important meeting this afternoon.

It seems that after the last time he opened his asshole attached mouth and blaming whites for not being at the airport he suddenly now wants to play the white game. That is to work or at least in his case pretend to work.

It will be interesting to see if any of the other comrades are going to be in attendance to make some useless remarks.

Die Visserman

2009-09-12T19:34:00.000+02:00

I have started a Afrikaans blog Die visserman. Why, I think I will be able to moan and bitch much better than in Engleesh. After all some words can't be explained in English like!

Moerse = This can have quite a lot of meanings. Something that is big! "n moerse storm" Translated, A big storm! not quite the same. One of the best uses for the word is to express a violent attitude to some asshole that you do not like, or are invading your space. "Soek jy 'n moerse Klap!" Translated to something like, I will give you such a hard smack you will duck in a ten year old photo of yourself! But yet still not the same.

So I can continue with a lot more examples like Lekker or bliksem.

For those of you who can comprehend some Afrikaans, go check out Die Visserman! ( only two posts old!)

I can't wait

2009-09-11T12:53:00.000+02:00

to start my own business. The best part is that I do not need any capital to get going.

I received this lovely e-mail from Mrs Benita Rachidi and son Patrick. Damn I am so excited I am busy typing my resignation letter.

The email:

Good Day,

I would like to apply through this medium for your co-operation and to secure an opportunity to invest and do joint business with you and my family in your country.I have a substantial capital i honourably intend to invest in your country into a very lucrative business venture of which you are to advise and execute the said venture over there for the mutual benefits of both of us.

Your able co-operation is to become my business partner in your country and create ideas on how money will be invested,properly managed and the type of investment after the money is transferred to your custody with your assistance.

Meanwhile, on indication of your willingness to handle this transaction sincerely by protecting our interests and upon your acceptance of this proposal, I would furnish you with the full detailed information, procedure,amount involve and mutually agree on your percentage interest or share holding for helping me to secure the release of the deposit and investing the money.

I shall be glad to reserve this respect and opportunity for you, if you so desire, but do urge you to give the matter your immediate attention it deserves, feel free to email me back.

Yours Faithfully,

Mrs Benita Rachidi and son Patrick

FUCKING IDIOTS!!!!

The stealers

2009-09-09T10:23:00.000+02:00

Also better known as the dealers. We are talking cars here. I always wonder where the local car dealers (herein after the stealers) get there parts from. I just dropped HQ's car of at Toyota and low and behold you must see the quotes I get from these stealers.

Sir we need to replace the brake pads and V- Belt for the cool amount of R6000.00. What are you fucking mad! I do not want to overhaul the engine!

I wonder how they can justify these markups.

But the backup plan is in place, just need to take the car to my mechanic.

It has been

2009-09-07T20:02:00.000+02:00

a long time since I posted anything on this blog as my two readers might have noted. I was reallyyyyyyyyy not feeling like posting anything.

But tonight my family is in sorrow. One of HQ's cats got killed this morning. She had her for close on 5 years. HQ is a cat person and she is full of tears. So the mood in our house is quite sombre.

On a lighter note my little boy found out that he's got a couple of legs that can work in conjunction with the arms. So he is mobile as from last week Wednesday. Gone are the days that you can leave him in one spot.

I have also started this last weekend on a very long postponed woodworking project. I have eventually planed down all the wood that was lying outside(Apart from the Fucked up Beams Max)
They are now safely in the garage and as soon as time permits the dust is going to fly!

And for the joke of the day , I got bitten by a fucking Jack Russell today. The fucking thing was just to quick to receive a good kick against the head. But the bastard has drawn blood and I have told his owner that it was his last free bite he took from me.(The owner being my daughter's nursery school teacher) Next time I will kick with intent! Actually wondered if I should go for a Tetanus shot!

Ah well to all my readers, Chat to you again next month.

The long weekend....

2009-08-11T07:57:00.000+02:00

We visited the in-laws in Sabie over this long weekend. We spend some time driving to the towns bordering Sabie as we have not done that in quite a while.

The Saturday morning we went to Harry's pancakes in Graskop. The next moment this massive thunderous sound filled the place. When I saw the origins of the sound I thought of old Max. He would have fouled his pants.

Not one but 9 custom built choppers stopped in front of the place. Pretty awesome. When I walked out with my little one, (9 months old) a orange chopper drew my attention. As I looked at it the owner of the bike walks up and said I must put my little one on the seat and take a picture. How nice of him. Only problem I did not have anything to take a picture with.

I enquired on his bike. He proudly showed me a plague fitted just under neath the fuel tank on the left side. Orange County, from the famed Discovery channel chopper builders.

Bloody awesome piece of machine.

On Sunday we took a drive to Hazyview for a breakfast at Sabie River bungalows. The rest of the Sunday was spend walking about the farm on which my in-laws stay.

Sabie is even starting to return to it old looks. After most of the massive forest fires they had a couple of years ago the plantations is being replanted again with some trees already reaching about a meter high. Just 20 more years to wait for the old Sabie to return.

Well my sister can now be

2009-07-29T10:13:00.000+02:00

officially considered to be a supermodel. She recently won the titel of supermodel of the year at IMTA which was held in New York last week.